First we had all that snow that prevented people from coming out and shopping on the markets. Traders were losing gear all the way up to Christmas Eve, ordering stuff as usual and then having to chuck it away, with nowhere to store it over Christmas. I know several in the trade who lost good money over the holiday this year, including myself. The queer long Christmas holiday made it worse: most places had four days off, and some had the whole of the week between Christmas and New Year. By the time we got back half the regular customers had disappeared, and they still haven't all reappeared yet. I think some must have got trapped in the supermarkets...
Rum Customers.
We get some rum customers on the markets at times. Every trader has a wealth of stories to tell. Our latest was a woman who didn't like being called 'Darlin'.
'Can I help you, Darlin'?'
'How dare you call me Darlin'?'
'Sorry Darlin'?'
'I won't be spoken to in that manner! How dare you?'
'What Darlin'?'
'There! You've said it again! I don't suppose you call the men Darlin'?'
'All the time, Darlin'. It's just a friendly habit. Would you prefer M'duck?'
'I'm not a duck, either. I want it to be Sir and Madam, if you don't mind'
'Make your mind up which you are then, Darlin'. It's all the same to me, we get all sorts on here'
'How dare you insinuate...'
'I wouldn't want to insinuate if I had the chance, Darlin'. If you want to be called Sir or Madam I suggest you go over to Debenhams; they'll Sir or Madam you there, but you'll have to pay a quid for an orange!'
Off she went with her toffee-nose in the air, just trying to find somebody else to pounce on. Nowt so queer as folk, as they say up in Yorkshire. She said she was going to complain, so I asked our traders' federation branch secretary where I stood on the matter, and he said that all over the world markets are widely regarded as a shopping place for working people. The persons owning the businesses on the markets are working people, and so are their assistants. Therefore anyone expecting to be served in a market must expect both stallholders and assistants to use (polite) working class language, banter, and familiarities.
When you think about it the use of terms like 'darlin', darling', 'my duck', 'm'duck', 'dear, 'm'dear', etc are local variations of similar terms employed in markets throughout the British Isles, and indeed in markets throughout the world. In the North of England terms like 'luv', 'pet', 'flower' 'hinny', etc are also used, along with others.
These sorts of phrases, and all their local and regional variations, help to give colour and warmth and accent to a market, and make it a more pleasant place to buy at. For most people this is an essential part of the local shopping experience, wherever they are. It is just one of the many things that give a market its unique atmosphere.
In all of these terms there is no other intent than to strike up a pleasant, friendly, easy-going start to the business of buying and selling. If a prospective customer does not like being addressed in this sort of manner, one might ask what are they doing shopping in a market in the first place? If they do not wish to be addressed like this, the simple answer to their problem is to shop elsewhere. Supermarkets for example, have little or no verbal interchange with their customers, and therefore give a duller shopping experience.
So there you have it. I remember reading some time back - 2006, 2007 - that Newcastle City Council, I think it was, were trying to make their council workmen stop using Geordie terms of endearment to working people they came into contact with, in case someone thought it was not politically correct. Enough to make you sick, isn't it? Still, I can't help but think the PC crowd are on their way out now; they were a product of a pampered middle-class society obsessed with itself, but they'll have little time for that in the future.
With thousands of these useless pen-pushers out of work they'll have to get used to looking through the bins and the scrap like the rest of us.
'Jer wanta 'and wi' that sack of rotten taters, Darlin?'
Happy New Year to You All!
